you can't learn that in school

A couple of months ago, the following email popped up in my inbox.

"Dear Student,

The Admissions Office at Brigham Young University Idaho is pleased to offer you a special opportunity to attend this upcoming Spring 2015 semester in addition to your regular Fall/Winter track."

Aside from the fact that was a deeply impressed by the personalization of this letter, I was excited with the idea of being able to continue my studies at BYU-Idaho. Yes, dear reader, I was actually EXCITED to keep on studying, even after two semesters of heavy courses and responsibilities. Strangely, I was sad to be leaving behind paper writing and being a Relief Society president and busy work ... okay, maybe I wasn't too broken up over the busy work. 

Needless to say, college has been excellent for my personal development. As weird as this might sound, podunk Rexburg, Idaho, was my veritable paradise because of the constant availability of stimulating and novel opportunities. I won't be too far removed from this strange but wonderful college-town atmosphere -- when I move to Provo in the summer, I will be able to have similar experiences -- but in the meantime, I am back in sleepy ol' Waynesville, MO.

I decided in coming home that I was going to try to keep up having new learning experiences every day so as to not fall into a Netflix-binge depression. I didn't know how I was going to achieve this, seeing as I see at least seven people I know on an average trip to Wal-mart (thanks to my family living in the same place for twenty years). I have found, however, that instead of throwing my daily energy into building relationships with lots of different people, I am using this precious time that I have at home to build relationships with my family. They are my eternal best friends, and I have come to the conclusion that I only have a limited amount of time to show my adoration and appreciation.

Being home with this differently angled goal has been so much fun. My family is kind of like an exclusive club with our own humor and social cues, and it is awesome to participate now that I am officially feeling less post-RM awkwardness (it only took me ten months!). Even though the kids are at school during the day, I stay busy with house work and helping my parents. When the kids are home, I summon the energy to put together puzzles and hold tickle fight-club matches. The experiences that I am having are so very very different from my experiences at college ... but every day brings me just as much happiness and satisfaction.

I think that If I were in Rexburg right now, I would be having a ball. But if I were out west right now, there would be a lot of things that I couldn't do. I couldn't ruffle the boys hair as they play endless Studio C videos on YouTube. I wouldn't be learning the ins and outs of the family business. I couldn't talk to my mom about boy woes. I wouldn't be fixing broken radiators under Dad's watchful eye. I couldn't learn to build out-of-control fires that rival the Boy Scout equivalent. I wouldn't be able to visit Grandpa after his back surgery. I couldn't be chatting with Nandy about life while cleaning her house. I couldn't teach the primary kids at church about the insects and Jesus.

In other words, in my time at home, I have learned that everything in life has its season. I am glad that for this little season, Heavenly Father is allowing me to attend the university of life ... taught from within the walls of my childhood home. 

It just goes to show that you can't learn everything at school.

Hey! I'm playing a little bit of catch-up with my pictures ... but we were able to go to General Conference in honor of Hyrum's 12th birthday!! Such a fun experience!!

Week Sixty-Eight: Working the Plan

Area: Collao
Companion: Hermana Quintana

Dear familia,

Can I just say that I love the church? I love this gospel so so so much.

We had a super awesome experience this week. Hermana Quintana is a master teacher. She is sooo good at being a missionary. We were teaching one of our investigators this week ... she is an active Evangelical lady that comes to our church in the morning and then has to run out to attend her church in the afternoon. But she is awesome. She keeps her commitments and is willing to follow whatever the voice of the Lord tells her.

Our lesson for the day was about the Plan of Salvation. We asked her how she had felt reading the Book of Mormon, and she said that the only feeling that she felt was fear. Uhhh, not the thing that you want to hear from an investigator, butchaknow ... we talked about the spirit and said a prayer and started to talk about the Plan of Salvation. When we got to this life on earth, Silvia (the name of the investigator) looked at the steps ... faith, repentance, baptism, the holy ghost ... and Hermana Quintana asked, "Where are you at right now?" Silvia looked at us and said ... "Well, I have been baptised ... but I don't feel like I have the Holy Ghost." She started to cry.

She came to the conclusion that the path that she has been on up to this moment isn't the right one. The Spirit told her in that moment that the church is true and that she needed to be a part of it. It was such a cool thing to experience. Hermana Quintana and I were walking in shock the whole rest of the day. Silvia has fecha to be baptised on the 25th of April.

Mini Cambio Girls

I went to Lirquen on a mini cambio this week. The girls over there are doing sooo much better. Since last cambio's crazy drama, things feel so much better. I was so impressed by the drive that all of the hermanas have to keep working working working ... to take advantage of every minute. That drive is something that is so important in missionary work. You have to be motivated by something higher than numbers and getting glory at home. I feel like I am pushed forward every day by something deeper than anything I can describe. It is an awesome feeling.

Sister study session. Our group is HUGE.

Really, the most exciting thing that happened this week was GENERAL CONFERENCE. I have been looking forward to this for so so so long. I didn't really have any burning questions that I wanted answered ... I just wanted the Spirit to teach me and testify to me that the church is true. Boy oh boy did I feel the spirit.

I learned a couple of things that really really made a difference. First of all ... I don't know if you caught on, but all of the talks on Saturday had so much to do with eternal marriage. Every single person said, "Eternal marriage between a man and a woman." (This freaked Hermana Quintana out ... because she is going to have to be thinking about that in 4 more weeks when she goes home). But I really did feel the spirit testify to me the importance of temple marriages. The importance of making sacred covenants in the temple. I am not trunky. I am not pining over every single thing that will happen after the mission, but I know and feel comfort in the fact that I am not going to settle for anything less than an eternal family. That is what I want for all of my investigators as well. I just want them to get to the temple!!

Some hills in Lirquen. The hills are crazy.

I love the basic principles of the gospel that the General Authorities taught. I loved that they used so many scripture stories. I loved Jeffrey R. Holland's talk (obviously). That story that he told about the two brothers gave me chills. I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for the gift of his son. I am so grateful for Jesus Christ. What a wonderful way to remember Him by having conference on Easter Sunday! I know that he lives!!

General Conference!!

Not much new to report today. I am loving life. We are reaching our goals every day and are working hard to see the hand of the Lord in all things. I love you all SOOO SOOO SOOOO MUCH!! :) Have a great week!!

Love,

Laney

Bishop Vargas and his wife, Rosa.

Our Testigos de Jehova hats. All of the Jehovah's Witnesses
wear these babies.

Week Forty-Two: Stretching ...

Area: Frutillares
Companion: Hermana Caseres

Dear familia,

Welp, we got news of cambios today. I was feeling a little unsure of what was going to happen ... I feel good about my work that I have done in Frutillares, and I was pretty sure I was going to leave on a good note. Imagine my surprise when Elder Calizaya told me, "You're going to be staying here for another cambio!" I couldn't really talk. I looked over at Hermana Caceres ... I am grateful to still be with her! We are going to keep on chugging in this little Rama. I am praying for a lot of strength and a lot of excitement ... if you could pray for that, too ... I would appreciate it.

This week was really, really slow in preparation for General Conference. It is amazing how different conference feels as a missionary. It is something sooo vital and so exciting! But a lot of wonderful things happened this week to make up for it.

We had a mini cambio this week! I was with Hermana Heslop and we had such a great time. It seems like we were just on a mini cambio ... but I loved it! Hermana Heslop has been such a great help for me in my mission and I am grateful for her example. There are a few things that I struggle with as a missionary that I have always wanted to improve (verification, commitments, etc.) and when I see the examples of other great missionaries, it gives me the motivation and the will-power that I need to change.

I don't really know what to write this week. It was a lot of the same things of every week! We are working hard with the members and are working on finding people that are going to progress. Heavenly Father is really helping us in that aspect. He is always preparing His children -- and he always has been ... Sometimes, we just have to wait to see the progress. This week, we had a zone class and I felt good about the work that we have done here. We are really doing the very best that we can.

General Conference was incredible! It is sooo awesome to think that I was watching the same conference talks that you guys were watching at the exact same time. When we sang the songs together ... the same thing. How powerful is that??

First of all, I got an answer about where I need to go to college. I have to go back to BYUI. I have to go back. I don't remember who was speaking or what was being said, but I felt pretty stinking sure that it was what I needed to do. As I was praying about this answer the other night, I told Heavenly Father, "You know, I am willing to do whatever you want me to do. I am willing to go where ever you want me to go. Just help me to know what you want and I'll do it." And He told me. He wants me to be at BYUI. Even though when I made my lists of pros and cons and BYU won by a landslide. Even though all of my friends from the mission are going to be attending BYU after the mission. I promise that my answer has nothing to do with boys ... I specifically took out that aspect because I didn't want my decision to be based on any person. So ... I guess that changes things a little bit.

I also LOVED the talk that Richard G. Scott gave. The Sunday afternoon session was awesome! I really was touched by the simple tools that God has given us to be able to receive His help in our lives. They are the things that He has always given us ... and they are always available ... sometimes, we have to make little adjustments to make them more useful in our lives. I personally feel so excited to better my study of the scriptures and my prayers. I really am committed to find out what the will of the Lord is in my life and to do it!

The Lord has a plan that is bigger than the things that I want. He wants me to strech and grow and reach my full potential. I know that. The stretching isn't always that pleasant, but I sure I am learning the attribute of patience and love. I sure am learning how to trust in the Lord with all of my heart.

So ... my letter stinks today. I am so sorry! Know that I am alright. I am going to keep trooping right along. If you have any missionary ideas that are awesome, I would love to hear 'em. Oh, I would also love to hear from the kids. I don't know if you could have them scan letters and send them to me ... I just want to read how everyone is. I love you all a lot. This love seems to get bigger and bigger with every minute that I am away from home. It's okay if you guys don't come to Chile to pick me up. The most important thing is that we are together.

:) Have a great week!

Love,

Laney

Week Forty-One: The Most Important Things

[Someone posted this picture of Laney on facebook last week. Too cute!]

Area: Frutillares
Companion: Hermana Caseres

Dear familia,

Like always, so much happened this week. Soooooo much. It was a week of triumphs and tears and love and joy. Just another week in the mission. A VEEEEEER.

First of all, we had a sweet family asado with the Familia Torres on Monday after I wrote you guys. This family has been such a blessing in my mission. I cannot believe that I have already known them and loved them for so much time! We went with all of the missionaries that have served in Coyquen that are now serving in Estaca Penco. I love getting together with other people and learning more about their lives. I think that this makes the mission a lot more enjoyable for me. I really just enjoy listening.

We also had entrevistas this week with Presidente. When I think about the progress that I have made in three months, it kind of blows my mind. Three months ago, I entered into the office and just started to bawl. I completely lost it. Presidente had to calm me down and help me to see reason and I listened and tried to put his advice into practice. This time around, I entered into the office muuuuuuuuuuch calmer and in a way that was much more mature. I talked about the work that we have been doing and the bizarre memory problems that I have been having (like, with every single promise that I make or thing that I say I will do, I totally forget). I told him, "President, I just don't know how to do it all. It is the ONLY thing that frustrates me in the work. I know I am working hard ... and I don't know how I can be memorizing the baptismal questions, talking to everyone, programming citas, coordinating with the members ... just doing everything stresses me out!" President looked at me in a very calm way that kind of pierces the soul and said, "You can't do everything, Hermana. If you try to do everything, you are always going to be frustrated. What you have to do is attack the most important things. You have to prioritize your list of things to do."

I sat thinking for a couple of seconds. I wanted to ask him, "PRESIDENTE. COULD YOU TELL ME THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS? BECAUSE I REALLY HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO FIND THEM." But then these words poured out instead, "I guess I have to find out what my most important things are." President paused and said, "Yeah ... yeah, you do."

I left the interview with this little task. To find out what the most important things are and then to do them. It hasn't been that easy.

We had the New Conference this week for Hermana Caceres. I LOVED this conference when I was starting out and I was sooooo excited that Hermana Caceres was going to have the chance to go and enjoy it. She seemed a little bit apprehensive to go. I wasn't sure why ... especially because I am me and Frutillares is how it is ... and I knew that she would have a great experience and learn a lot. I explained this to her and it seemed to ease her fears a little bit. When we got to the office (my first of 8 trips to Concepcion this week), I hugged Hermana Caceres goodbye and she started to cry. Ohhhhhh man, I felt so bad. I felt bad that I was going to leave her there ... and it struck me again just how similar training must be to having a kid. I don't know if I cried when I went to school for the first time ... but still ... weirdly similar.

I worked with a ton of great Hermanas during these two days that taught me a lot about how to be a better missionary. I love mini-cambios for this! I always learn, even if I am with a newbie. It is really incredible. I was with Hermana Valle from Costa Rica and we had such a good time together. She has got the biggest personality in the world, but this really helped the people that we worked with that day. It was incredible to see the miracles that happened during this conference. I figured out that I have really gotta take advantage of the power of the newbies in the mission. Even though their ideas are sometimes whacko, most of the time the ideas that they have are AWESOME! I have really loved training.

Ambar, Darlene, Dafne, Me, Noelia, Hna. Caseres, Berssy

I love planning activities that are simple and fun. So, I planned this little whippersnapper with the Presidencia of the Young Women. We had a little spiritual part and I felt the spirit sooo strongly. I love the Young Women program and I am so grateful for the things that I learned there. After the spiritual part, we painted nails and made gummy bracelets. Not sure if this is a fad in the US yet, but EVERYONE makes these bracelets here and it is way fun!

The funny stories of this week ... One day this week, it was raining a BUNCH. We still have to talk to everyone, even in the pouring rain, so we were on our way home doing a few contacts to finish off the day. To have a little break from the rain, we paused under a bus stop and began talking to a kid that had to have ... 20 años or something. His accent was so weird, but I thought it would be rude to ask him where he was from ... because I feel offended sometimes when the people ask me the same question. We talked about his life and I explained what we do as missionaries. He listened really closely and asked us the best questions in the whole world. We got his address and everything, but for some reason, I really wasn't feeling the contact. I looked over at Hermana Caceres and she said nothing. Suddenly, this kid started to laugh and said, "I am tired of lying. I am a member." Hermana Caceres and I were sooooo embarrassed. Not only was he a member ... but a recently returned missionary from Argentina. Gosh ... I still feel embarressed. Luckily, we got a reference out of him ... and now it is just a funny story to tell ... but, hey ... you never know. For that very reason we talk to everyone haha.

Also, I officially have reached fat status. Me explico. Basically, we have that great investigator Jennifer from last week. During one of the citas that we had this week with her, we asked, "Is there anything that we can do to serve you?" Usually the people say, "Nooooooo, we need man help." so I wasn't really expecting anything crazy. But, to my surprise, Jennifer said, "You know, I am dying because it is so cold here. We've got this stove, but I haven't been able to get it installed because we don't have the money. Could you help me with that?" I don't know anything about installing stoves, but I told her that we could and we set a time to come back with a member.

We came back and it turned out that the stove was going to be just a bit more complicated than we thought. We measure out the pipes and they were going to have to bring in an electric saw to cut it down. No problem ... another chance to bring a member into the house of an investigator to give service and also have a lesson with member. We sat down after figuring that out on a sofa that Jennifer had. Hermana Caceres and the member sat down first ... and then I sat down. BOOM. The sofa crashed to the floor. In English, Jennifer said, "Oh my gosh." (I say it all of the time. It's starting to catch here in Chile). I broke the stinking sofa! Oh, another embarrassing situation. Luckily, we came back, fixed the sofa and the stove and everything was okay ... but now all I hear from every turn are fat jokes. I testify that weight gain is real in the mission.

We have got this sweet little nine year old girl that is going to get baptized in three weeks. Her mom is menos activo and they came out of the woodworks this past week. We asked her yesterday, "Will you pray to know if the church has been restored?" She told us, "I already did it. I felt sooooo good. I know it's true." I LOOOOOVED teaching this little girl. So much faith and so much desire to do what God wants. :) We are going to teach her way quickly.

This week, I felt a little junky emotionally. I don't feel like I have done that much in Frutillares. There are two missionaries that these people really love and remember, ELDER KELLER AND ELDER PITCHER. They were here in the rama during the earthquake and the people literally cry when they think on the work that they did. I have worked as hard as I can, but I sure don't feel like I have reached that status. All that I want from this area is to know that I helped to strengthen the branch ... because I love these people soooo much! But yesterday, all I heard from the members was. "Dang, you haven't passed by to see us in two weeks. Where have you been?" "I am disowning you (haha, the most dramatic)." "I was waiting for you on Friday so that we could go out and work together! How could you forget?" There was one menos activa that we have been working with that came to church yesterday and refused to talk to us ... I sat in Sacrament Meeting and I felt so bad. I felt so weak ... because I felt like I was letting down these people ... but I also felt like I was being treated unfairly somehow. I was sick of apologizing for the things that I have done and the things that I haven't done. I cried and cried and cried.

I thought about the most important things that I realized that I needed to find and I thought about the atonement. I got a blessing. I focused on the people that love me. Sometimes I feel like my emotions are like the tectonic plates of the earth. When the bounce together and all of the energy gets out, everything returns to normal. I returned to normal. I really do love being here in Frutillares. It breaks my heart that I can't do everything still ... because if I am being completely honest with myself I have always been a bit of a people pleaser ... but I told Heavenly Father last night that I am going to work hard to please him first. To seek the kingdom of God and then be patient with the other things. That is my most important thing -- to find the will of the Lord, to seek his guidance, and then to do it. It was a good lesson to learn.

I am soooo grateful for Jesus Christ. I could not function without Him and His sacrifice. It would be impossible to be a missionary that is happy without him. I am going to work more to depend on this knowledge that I have. I love my life!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST MOM IN THE WHOOOOOOOOOOOOLE WORLD!! I don't even know where I would be without you, mommy! I would probably be sockless ... and I would probably be a lot less sane. Thanks for letting me sit by you while you read and for talking to me about boys and teaching me about the gospel! You are awesome!!

HAVE A GREAT, GREAT, GREAT week!! I am soooo excited for General Conference!! I know that we have a living prophet on the earth today and I am so excited to listen to his words!! I love you all more than anything!

Love,

Laney

My favorite g-ma here -- Hna. Teresa. She is way stubborn
(because she tells us that she will never, ever, ever change her religion), but I LOVE her!

Week Sixteen: shaking the earth

The April 1st earthquake was actually centered 1400 miles north of the area where Laney is serving.

Area: Chillán
Companion: Hermana Hillary Harris 
Companion's blog: (http://hjhmissionabroad.blogspot.com/2014/04/earthquake-scare-i-love-general.html)

Dear Familia,

Okay, before I start rambling about General Conference and how incredible it was, I'll fill you in about the Chilean earthquake. So,on Tuesday, we went with our District Leader to interview Carolina for her baptism! Yeaaaaaah! It was really incredible, because she is so prepared to live the gospel and to make the sacred covenant of baptism. She really understands why it is so important! Love her! Anyways, this interview was late at night, so we left her house and started to head to our house so that we would be on time.

After we had thirty minutes sagrados (sacred minutes for planning), we got a call ... usually we get a call from our District Leader at this time, so we weren't really all that bothered ... but we looked at the screen and saw that it was our Zone Leaders instead. I don't know if you guys remember my personality at all ... I mean, it has been a little more than three months ... but I get a little nervous when it comes to disasters. Anyways, with that being said, "Hey, have you guys heard what happened?" is probably not the best way to start a conversation by phone. We just looked at each other ... Uh, no, we hadn't heard anything. They told us about the earthquake and I felt my knees go a little weak. Uhm, an earthquake? What the heck? They told us to pack a backpack and bring our waterbottles just in case. 

As soon as they hung up the phone, Hermana Harris and I just started running through our house. Okay, we need granola bars and water bottles. We need clothes and we need to change back into our normal clothes. We need to do this and this and this. It was nuts. Everything was packed up and we reached this awkward point in which we didn't really know what to do. So, we did what all anxious missionaries do. We started to eat. Before an earthquake is a perfect time to eat, right? Three pieces of french toast, two cups of hot chocolate, and a box of granola later ... we had pretty much eaten everything in the house. And then nothing actually happened ... yeah, we regretted that. But it was so funny and really a fun experience. :)

Okay, General Conference time!

Man, I love General Conference ... now more than ever (which is kind of incredible because I loved General Conference a lot before). We weren't able to see the Women's session last week which was a bummer, but they had a rebroadcast! When we walked into the chapel and saw the big screen ... ahhhh, I don't know if I have ever felt so excited! I LOVE knowing that prophets speak to us. There were a ton of incredible things that happened this week ... but I think that I will just talk a little bit about the things that I learned from this General Conference.

Probably the biggest lesson that I learned/relearned from conference was WHO I AM. I think that Satan works so hard to get us to forget that we are CHILDREN of A HEAVENLY FATHER. Isn't that the coolest thing in the world? I am a child of God! He loves me and is so willing to help me to do the right thing and to help me to be successful in my life. I think that for this cambio, remembering this and having trust in Heavenly Father's promises has been a difficult thing. Before this Conference, I really had faith in Heavenly Father. I mean, I know that he lives! I know it with all of my heart. But I think that I might have been lacking a little in the knowledge that he loves me like a DAD and can help me with EVERYTHING.. 

I have been trying so hard to work as a missionary, but I have been doing it kind of solo. (That is weird to type out, because I know that I have never been solo out here ... sometimes it just felt like it). I would try to think of ways to improve and implement the things that I was learning from Preach My Gospel, but I wasn't quite sure that Heavenly Father would help me with these things. How silly is that?? I thought that because I was trying really hard and I was doing all right that Heavenly Father was trusting me to do things on my own ... but I have learned during this transfer that I CANNOT do it alone. I CANNOT. And it has been a hard lesson to learn, especially because I never really felt like I was relying on my own strength. I don't know if that makes any sense ... but I just really needed a reminder that Heavenly Father is my Father. I needed to be reminded that if I have TRUE, DEEP faith and love for Him, He can help me through whatever.

I felt this so much during Conference. I was so humbled as I listened to the talks and I felt the love of Heavenly Father. It lifted my heart and helped me to see that I have been taking missionary work the wrong way for a couple of weeks. I had been having success ... a little bit ... but I haven't been relying on Heavenly Father to carry me through every moment. Now I know. I am going to apply this lesson for the REST OF MY LIFE. I love my Heavenly Father. I LOVE him. I am working to love Him more than any other thing, because I know that He loves His children in that way. It is such an incredible message that I want to share with everyone. Heavenly Father LOVES ME. It's incredible. This knowledge, now that I truly understand it, is changing my life already. I have already noticed the difference. Yes, when we really know who we are, Satan's power is diminished.

Anyways, that was my general rambling about General Conference. I hope that it makes even a little bit of sense. This Conference really was incredible! I was so jealous that you were there, but when they panned out on the audience during the intermediate hymns, I was like, "MAN, MY FAMILY IS THERE!!" It made me so happy to think of that and to think of the awesome time that you are having in good ol' Happy Valley.

Hey, my Spanish is improving! WHOOOOOO. I answer the phone all of the time now, and our District Leader always gets confused because he thinks that I am a Latina hahahahaha. I have been working so diligently with the little grammer book that we have and it is working miracles. I know that I was promised the gift of tongues ... and it is amazing to see how Heavenly Father is really multiplying my abilities. 

I love being a missionary. It is so enjoyable to be a soldier in the army of the Lord. We do so many incredible things with His help. Like I said before, I CANNOT do anything without Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ ... but with them, I can do ALL THINGS. I am so grateful for this knowledge. I hope you are doing awesome! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! Thank you for your prayers. I am totally feeling them every day! Have a wonderful week!!

Love,

Hermana Blau