I'm sitting on the rooftop of my dad's national headquarters and I am listening. Listening to the leaves rustle in the wind that never seems to end when you're this high. Listening to my thoughts; to my heartbeat. It is truly beautiful.
I've been wondering about my future lately. Who will I be? Who will I marry? What will I major in during college? Or even the simple things ... Will I pass high school as valedictorian? Should I try homeschooling one more time? I really need to prep for my five k tomorrow.
It makes me anxious to think like this. I hate it. My heart starts feeling heavy. My chest ... My whole body actually feels like it's being compressed into a tiny box. Thinking about the future is important, at least I think so, but my futuristic thinking consumes my entire body.
But up here, it all seems less important. Up here I think about a heavenly father that knows everything about me. I think about all of the little things that happen in the Missouri woodlands that he knows about too.
It's cool and breezy today. I am cool and breezy. I feel sublime. I feel clean. I feel pristine. Almost like a package of Orbitz gum.
Beauty is all around. Even when I feel like I am missing something, that there has to be something MORE ... It's there. I can feel it around me.
And I am content.