Yesterday was not a good one according to my books.
It seemed that nothing went right. It was cold and depressing at school (like always) and then after a long 2 and half hours spent after school, there was mutual. I won't go too into depth, but I feel out of sorts with the girls in my new group. They are already BFF's (and beaaaaautiful!), so there really is no place for me to squeeze my tiny personality in between.
Needless to say, I had a little get to know me time with myself. And it involved crying -- a lot of crying. It was for good though. It was really selfish of me to cry at all, but I felt as if I walked away with the knowledge that friends would come to me and that I would be able to endure whatever was put before me. I also realized that my whole concept of "womanly attributes" is based on what I like in others, not what I like in myself. What I really need is some confidence pants to get me out of these endless trudges I go through.
Off the yesterday train, today was much better. It was warm outside, I got most of the things I neglected to do yesterday done -- it was just ... better. I can't explain the feeling I had throughout the day. It gave me power. I felt as though I was okay and not alone. I know the Lord's hand was prevalent in my life today.
As George Harrison says, "here comes the sun." Spring is on the verge and just knowing that makes me way happier.